Jon and I put up our Christmas tree this week. Jon said he felt like we missed Christmas in our own home last year...so this year we are starting to celebrate when we feel like it...and not waiting until after Thanksgiving to do so...He loves to decorate and celebrate....

For some reason I used to detest early Christmas...and I am not exactly sure why...a friend was in town this week and said it was all a marketing scheme to get people to put more money into the economy...and maybe I used to think that way too or maybe there was some kind of baggage from my past that used to keep me some what cynical...but this year it just means that I can justify all the little purchases that I like to make for my husband on a regular basis ;) ...it is for Christmas after all...no really, besides that, I think it is a good sign that things are changing, seasons are passing, and some how my heart is different.

Despite what impression I may have given after my last post, I am very happy here. This has been the best fall I can remember in a long time...and not just because of the beautiful colors...but because of change and growth and heart ache and laughter. I am living life and enjoying it more this year than in years past...but I still long to be able to take off to far corners of the earth and explore. I am fascinated by life different than mine....if there were not over 300 countries in the world one of my life goals would be to visit every single one of them.

I kind of dropped off the blogging planet...I think there just has been so much going on in my life that some how I have let writing slip away from me...I have had to search so deep within to try and deal with things on the outside that I feel like parts of me have dissipated...

I feel like a little bit of me has come back...I feel as though seeing and talking to the people who were with me through my time overseas has grounded me again...has made my heart ache for their company...has made the hugs that much more sweeter...I have quality people in my life and I miss them...I miss getting to hug their necks...I miss exploring foreign worlds with them...I miss surviving craziness with them....I miss feeling alive and adventurous....

Sometimes I forget I have longings and passions...I get so caught up in what is going on around me now that I have quit dreaming those deep down heart felt dreams...I can only see what is right in front of me and sometimes that is tough...

My husband told me this week that he thinks it is cute that I am always voicing how "someday we will go here" and "someday we will do this". I think there is still a part of me that remembers how to dream...and I hope she never goes away...

A Fall Sunday spent in the Mountains...