Funny that today I realized through "youth" and into my "adult" life thus far, I have been wearing medium and large shirts, when in all reality, I wear a small.

I finally wrote my dad back today after three weeks of trying to figure out what it was I wanted to say...I know you won't really understand why this is a big deal...but in a way it was a first, and hopefully a step tword something. I made my best attempt at being honest. Should honesty in relationships be such a struggle? A little while ago a friend commented on my honesty with people...but am I really honest? Is it a matter of confidence that allows one to operate in honesty throwing all other care and concern to the wind as one operates in personal integrity? Or is it about being willing to be out right honest in all aspects of my life. To make the choice. Is there a point when it is not about it being a choice but who you are? Honesty. Vulnerability. I think I am realizing that I have failed on the honesty account in certain aspects of life...it is time for some things to change...

I am growing increasingly tired of the facade.